Saturday evening I was at the Llannerch & Gredington’s Joint “Ladies Evening” in Llangollen. The evening was a formal event so the dress code was Dinner suits, dress shirts, bow-ties, the works. The majority of the evening was very enjoyable, with good company, great food, beer, etc. and Several hundred pounds were raised for charity just from raffle tickets alone.
In fact the evening was enjoyable right up to the toasts, of which there were two. Firstly the Master of Llannerch got up to give a quick toast of “the queen“. The other toast of the evening was “the ladies” and was to be a longer toast more like a speech. And which poor victim was designated with this responsibility? Yes you guessed it, My good self!. Now I should take a second here to point out this was the first “Ladies Night” I had been to, and as such had never seen or heard a ladies toast before, so had no bearing to work from.
I should also point out I am a shy person, So standing up in front of over a hundred people who regularly attend such functions to perform the toast was terrifying. So I start into my spiel, and it seems to be going ok, the ladies present seem to be cheering, and agreeing with what I’m saying and “tutting” at their escorts, while the Men seem to be more growling at me, and denying things. Well I finished my bit and got to sit back down again.
Later on that evening while standing about with a couple of other men I received death threats, and quotes like :-
“How could you stand there and say those things!!! Don’t you realise what you’ve done???” “My wife wants breakfast in bed tomorrow now” “I have to get flowers after” “How you say that? what you doing??” “Don’t worry we’ll get him later“
I did point out to them that I am currently Single, and if they go and pick on a single bloke to make the ladies toast, then they have to expect to live with whatever damage he decides to cause. 🙂
