Yes I know it’s spelled Karmic, but why miss out on the opportunity of a pun 😉

 

Last night on my commute home, I came upon a long straight stretch of road that for once was clear of all traffic in either directions (myself excluded) So I got to travel along at the speed limit <cough>slightly over</cough>. There I am, happily travelling along when WHOOSH!!!

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A black sports car goes flying past me at least 20 mph over the legal limit, and heading for an unbelievably twisty, winding mountain pass at a seriously unsafe speed. I barely have time to shake my head at the stupidity when a red sporty BMW comes whooshing up as well, but due to oncoming traffic coming out the mountain pass, he has to pull in behind me.

NOTE: I think they were racing, which is stupid and dangerous on normal roads, but on Welsh country roads? which are very twisty and you can not see far ahead, and any bend could be hiding tractors, horse riders, sheep or cows, its fraking stupid!

After the oncoming cars pass, the driver of the BMW decides to overtake, but since we are now entering the pass he can’t, so instead he pulls back in behind me and tries to communicate with me. He flashes his headlights loads, then speeds up so his bumper is almost touching mine, and starts revving his engine with the clutch in to make it roar.

Alas, since I do not speak TrippleD (Dangerous Driving Dick)  I try my best to translate.

  • Flashing Headlight: If I recall the highway code, this means Danger? A Warning.
  • Bumper to Bumper: No idea, maybe he’s trying to hug me.
  • Revving Engine Like mad: Ah, my engine is going to fast?

OK, he is obviously telling me I am driving too fast and I need to slow down. So I do, right down to 30 mph. I believe I guessed the translation correctly as he stops flashing his lights and pulls back a bit. But he keeps doing the revving loudly thing, the poor thing much be worried I will loose control on a bend. SO even thought I am going really slow, I break for every bend, and go round them almost at a crawl.

What seems like hours later (Gods, it seemed to take forever to navigate the pass at a crawl) we reach the end, and my friend hugs me again by going bumper to bumper, then pulls out into the path of oncoming traffic forcing them to practically do an emergency stop, before he shot off up the road and out of sight.

“Gosh darn, that’s a bit dangerous” I announced

I did not expect to see him again, well maybe sticking out of a hedge, or upside down in a ditch. So imagine my surprise when a short while later I turned a bend and came right up behind the TripleD in the red BMW. Now double that surprise when I realise in front of him is the TripleD in the black sports car that blurred past me before the pass. They are both travelling along at a stupid slow speed, because in front of them…

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..Was a Farmer, driving a battered old Land Rover. And he was driving practically in the middle of the road blocking both lanes. Whenever a car approached from the other direction, he would pull back into our lane to let them pass before pulling back out to prevent the TripleD’s from overtaking.

I will not lie Dear Constant Reader. I may have given that old farmer a high5, and cheer, there may even have been a tear shed, over the utter brilliance. I felt a kindred spirit with that farmer. Alas I do not believe the TripleD’s understood the great carmic force, they just seemed to be very angry, or giving each other and the farmer hugs. As I said, I do not speak their language.

Drive Safe.