Author: GothNinja

One More than the Queen of England – Revisited

Oct30
Published on: October 30, 2014
Categories: Misc
Tags:
Comments: 2 Comments
 

Last week I was annoying my mother while visiting my parents, and she threatened me :-

Mother: “Just remember your birthday is coming up!”

Me: “Yup, next Saturday!”

Mother: “Yes, Sunday”

Me: “Sat-ur-day!”

Mother: “No, Sunday, Saturday is the 1st”

Me: “Yes, the 1st, Saturday, my birthday”

Mother: “But your birthday is the 2nd”

Me: “1st!!

Mother: “Are you sure? I’m positive it’s the 2nd”

Me: “It’s the 1st as it has always been”

Mother: “Really?. what does it say on your birth certificate?”

Me: “the 1st!!!”

Mother: “that does not sound right, Why do I think it’s the 2nd??”

The conversation then went into the area of, “When was I actually born” which reminded me of an old post where I explained my theory I should get a 3 day birthday.

 

From the vault “One More than the Queen of England

Weird post title right? What I am referring to is birthdays, The Queen of England has two birthdays a year, Myself I have Three. So if you will sit down comfortably dear Reader, I’ll explain, mostly because its become a FAQ.

A few years ago a friend offered to do one of those astronomical charts for me, One of the larger complicated ones that show your personality, and long term fortune, etc. So I gave my friend the details I had, Date of Birth, and Location of Birth. Both of which are required for accuracy. I was then informed that if i wished a more accurate chart then they would need my time of birth, because when it comes to stars that take a millennium for the light to reach us, knowing what minute you were born makes all the difference. So I asked my parents for the time of my birth.

I think I’ll jump ahead here to the conversation with my friend later, for pure comedy affect.

F=Friend, M=Me

F:So, you got the time of your birth?

M: Yes, Nov 1st

F:no the TIME? if you don’t know the exact time you can narrow it down to morning, afternoon, evening, night. it will still help with accuracy

M:Nov 1st

F:No, can they narrow it down a bit?

M:They did, they narrowed it down to Nov 1st. Apparently no one made a not of when i was born, and they latter could not work out if it was Oct 31st, Nov 1st, Nov 2nd. so the narrowed it down to the middle one, Nov 1st

F:You just can’t do anything normal can you? you even managed to mess up and complicate getting born!

It turns out that it was a very long and painful labor, and I was a home birth (a uncommon occurrence at the time). Also the Midwife was not that good, and forgot to fill in the forms at the time. She also banged my head repeatedly against the bed, but thats a different story. So basically everyone was tired, exhausted, and under belief that the midwife did her job. It was only later when it came time to register my birth they realised they were unsure of the date. My father, Mother & Nian (Grandmother) all believed different days.

They settled on the middle day of the range, since it was central and my mothers vote (well she did have the pain so its only fair). Since then a few people have stated I’m more suited to a Halloween birth than a All Saints Day birth.  The upshot is that since I was born on one of three possible days, I think to play safe I should celebrate my birthday over the full three day period. Its the only way I can be sure I have got the right day.


2 Comments

Poem: Samhain

Oct30
Published on: October 30, 2014
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: No Tags
Comments: No Comments
 

A bit of mindless fun considering the time of year!

Samhain comes just once a year

and when it comes it brings much fear

for the dead get just this night

to leave their graves to spread such fright

Ghost and Ghouls and Zombies arise

So best stay in doors if you are wise

and from trick or treater’s you best keep clear

else you’ll be with them this time next year


No Comments

All Hallows Read

Oct29
Published on: October 29, 2014
Categories: Holiday
Comments: No Comments
 

AHR13_LargePromoTout#allhallowsread

So what is All Hallow’s Read?
All Hallow’s Read is a Hallowe’en tradition. It’s simply that in the week of Hallowe’en, or on the night itself, you give someone a scary book.Scholars have traced its origins as far back as this blog post.

Is this instead of Trick or Treat? Because I don’t want to get egged, and the kids around here are mean.
Not at all. Trick or Treat is Trick or Treat. This is All Hallow’s Read, a great excuse to give someone a book.You can give out scary books or comics to trick or treaters on Hallowe’en if you want to, obviously. (We recommend looking the child in the eye and saying, “Take it. Read it. Trust me… around here… a book can be… safer than candy.” Then chuckling to yourself, as if remembering something unfortunate that happened to some of the local children only last year.)

What kind of scary book?
An appropriate one. If you’re giving a kid a scary book, make it a kid-appropriate scary book. You wouldn’t give the same kind of scary book to one person than you would another, any more than one book is right for everyone. People like different things.
Do I have to buy it new?
Nope.Obviously, we support bookshops and authors, but more than that, this is about making a holiday tradition of book-giving. So feel free to give second-hand books or books from your own shelves. And feel just as free to buy a beautiful new book from a small independent bookseller, or from online or… look, there’s no wrong way to buy a book. You can even gift it to their Kindle.

How do I choose an All Hallow’s Read book?
If you do not know what scary book to give someone, talk to a bookseller or a librarian. They like to help. Librarians will not mind even if you admit that you are not planning to take out a book, but instead you are going to buy one and give it to someone.
What about the apostrophe in “All Hallow’s Read”?
We are not sticklers for it. In the Twitter hashtag it has to be #AllHallowsRead. Apostrophise or not. We shall not judge you.
Can it really be that simple?
Not necessarily. It’s All Hallows Read, a tradition we just made up. You can fancy it up as much as you like. Just make sure you give someone a scary book this Hallowe’en…

No Comments

For those who celebrate – Happy Mabon (Autumn Equinox)

Sep22
Published on: September 22, 2014
Categories: Holiday, Pagan
Tags: ,
Comments: No Comments
 

Its September the 22nd 2012 which means its the Autumn Equinox.

So if you celebrate any of the following The holiday of Autumn Equinox, Harvest Home, Mabon, the Feast of the Ingathering, Men Fmhair or Alban Elfed (in Neo-Druidic traditions) I wish you a Happy *INSERT NAME HERE*


No Comments

Avast Ye Scury Scoundral!

Sep19
Published on: September 19, 2014
Categories: Holiday
Comments: No Comments
 

Arrrrrr it be Sep 19th, and that means only one thing!

Yes, its time to swash your buckle, walk that plank and curse the landlovers.. Arrrr it be

International Talk Like A Pirate Day

avastyescurvyscoundrel

Picture From Waspi Square By Paul Taylor

http://www.talklikeapirate.com/


No Comments

o2 Sales Call

Sep11
Published on: September 11, 2014
Categories: Mobile Phones
Comments: No Comments
 

I just had a nice entertaining sales call from o2.

 

O2: “Hi, we’re calling from o2 to thank you for being a loyal customer and to let you know about some great offers we have for you to thank you for being loyal. Are you free to talk?”

Me: *watches code compile* “Sure why not!”

O2: “How do you find your O2 experience.”

Me: “Fine apart from having no signal anywhere.”

O2: “Oh.. right, are you happy with the amount of free minutes and texts you have? could we offer you more?”

Me: “I never use the ones I have, due to never having a signal.”

O2: “right, I see you have a data plan. Using the internet on your phone is good, do you need a bigger allowance so you can use it more?”

Me: “Never use the data, There are no places around here with an Internet signal.”

O2: “we are slowly upgrading our masts from 3G to 4G so you will soon have super fast internet to your phone. Does your phone handle 4G?”

Me: “4G? I’d be happy with 3G, No, I’d be happy with 1G or even just a phone signal…”

O2: “errr.. is there anyone else in your household with mobile phones?”

Me: “Yes.”

O2: “Ahhh.. are they on O2??”

Me: “Yes, yes they are….. currently”

O2: “And what’s their view of O2 and their accounts?”

Me: “They are happy, apart from not having a signal anywhere!!”

O2: “err, since you use a lot of Data would you consider or be interested in getting a contract with us with a tablet computer, we have a nice deal on iPads…..”

Me: “Didn’t we cover I don’t use the Phones data use because there is no signal anywhere.”

O2: “right.. errr.. ok.. hummm.. well Thank you, have a nice day….”

O2: *Hangs Up*

 

Phoning to talk about increasing use of phone and 4G. When there is NO phone signal where I live for even calls/texts. There is no signal during my commute to work, and barely a phone signal in the area I work (Phone only no data).  I believe the local Town has a 13 foot circle where you can get 3G, if the wind is blowing in the right direction.

This is a shame, I have been with O2 since before they were O2, My sim still says “BT Genie” on it. And apart from the last several years I never had any signal issues, I had voice/sms everywhere. And now, nowhere.

Isn’t progress great.

Answers via carrier pigeon please.


No Comments

11-09-01

Sep11
Published on: September 11, 2014
Categories: Politics
Comments: No Comments
 

Because we can never let Terrorists of any Nation/Creed/Religion/Belief Win.

We here at the Three Ninjas Join our American Friends/Readers in remembering.

 



No Comments

Sept. 10th is the Internet Slowdown

Sep10
Published on: September 10, 2014
Categories: Blog, Geek
Comments: No Comments
 

Sept. 10th is the Internet Slowdown

Cable companies want to slow down (and break!) your favorite sites, for profit. To fight back, let’s cover the web with symbolic “loading” icons, to remind everyone what an Internet without net neutrality would look like, and drive record numbers of emails and calls to lawmakers.

Are you in?

We here at the Ninja Temple are supporting this important issue. Which is why you saw a “Loading” page when you connected.

Help us spread the world, and keep the Net Free, Unrestricted, And speedy!!!

More Information can be found @ https://www.battleforthenet.com

Hack The Planet

No Comments

When God created Wales

Jul31
Published on: July 31, 2014
Categories: Comedy
Tags: ,
Comments: No Comments
 

In the beginning the Lord God Almighty turned to the Archangel
Gabriel, and said:

“Today I am going to create a beautiful part of the Earth and I will
call it Wales. I will make a country of breathtaking blue lakes, rich
green forests and dark beautiful mountains from which from time to
time will be snow-covered. I will give it clear, swift rivers that will
overflow with salmon and trout.

The land shall be lush and fertile on which the people can raise cattle
and grow their food, as well as being rich with precious metals and
stones that will be sought after, the World over.

Underneath the land I shall lay rich seams of coal for the inhabitants to
mine. Around the coast I will make some of the most beautiful areas in
the World. White sandy beaches and cliffs that will attract all manner
of wildlife, and lots of islands that will be paradise to all who visit
them. In the waters around the shores there will be abundance of sea-life.

The people who will live there will be called the Welsh, and they will
be the friendliest people on my Earth. They will have magic in their
blood, and songs in their souls. Their Voices when raised in song shall
challenge the choir of angels.”

“Excuse me, sire” interrupted the Archangel Gabriel, “don’t you think
that you are being a bit generous to these Welsh?”

The lord just smiled and replied “You have not seen the neighbours
I’m giving them!”


No Comments

Sometimes I am a Dick

Jul24
Published on: July 24, 2014
Categories: Office, Work
Comments: No Comments
 

*Phone rungs*

Me:Good afternoon, Insane Asylum!

Caller:Hi. can I speak to Joan Crawshore please.

Me:Who? Sorry no one of that name here.”

Caller:Sorry it’s who I have down as a contact there, well who can I talk to about changing your power supplier.”

Me:Humm. that would be a Dave Jones”

Caller:Can I speak to them please?

Me:Sorry, He’s on holiday atm. He’ll be back in 2 weeks.

Caller:Thanks, I’ll call back then.

 

Two weeks later :-

 

*Phone rungs*

Me: “Good afternoon, Insane Asylum!

Caller: “Hi. can I speak to Dave Jones please.

Me: “Who? Sorry no one of that name here.”

Caller: “Sorry it’s who I have down as a contact there, well who can I talk to about changing your power supplier.”

Me: “Humm. that would be a Thomas Evens”

Caller: “Can I speak to them please?

Me: “Sorry, He’s on holiday atm. He’ll be back in 2 weeks.

Caller: “Thanks, I’ll call back then.

 

Two weeks later :-

 

*Phone rungs*

Me: “Good afternoon, Insane Asylum!

Caller: “Hi. can I speak to Thomas Evenss please.

Me: “Who? Sorry no one of that name here.”

Caller: “Sorry it’s who I have down as a contact there, well who can I talk to about changing your power supplier.”

Me: “Humm. that would be a Susan Jenkins”

Caller: “Can I speak to them please?

Me: “Sorry, She’s on holiday atm. She’ll be back in 2 weeks.

Caller: “Thanks, I’ll call back then.

 

This may have been going on for several months now….

I’m slowly running out of made up names.

 


No Comments
page 1 of 62 »
Archive


October 2014
M T W T F S S
« Sep    
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
2728293031  
Buy a Ninja a Pint


Want to help support this site? Or maybe just buy one of the Ninjas a Pint. Feel free to donate any amount you wish.


Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

License



Welcome , today is Friday, October 31, 2014